Posts Tagged ‘Lot’

alright so i was in a relationship for a while but thats over and now im starting to go out a lot and date people. i dont exactly have trouble, im good at flirting and attracting guys but i want to go after really hot guys.. haha like theres a few that live in my appartment complex that i wouldnt mind going out with, so if anyone has good tips, that would be great.

i think i know what to do in terms of hair, makeup, clothes, ect.

i want to start working out more, like doing pilates and more cardio. im not overweight, but i just want to really look good haha. (for myself as well as to get guys)

oh and i know that being confident is the most important.. smiling, laughing, being fun, all that good stuff

anyway, i think i’ve gone on enough about this stuff, i want to hear what all of you have to say :]

bend over lol jk show play hard 2 get

Technorati Tags: Clothes, Flirting, Good Stuff, Hot Guys, Lot, Makeup, Overweight, Pilates, Play 2, relationship

Ever since I was really little, I’ve always believed that it was impossible for a man to actually care about a woman. I believed that women could fall in love with men, but not the other way around.

I’m a 17-year-old female and I am straight. I do not, however, want to have sex, it repulses me. The thought makes me nauseous and uncomfortable. I know that I would never want to be in a relationship with women the same way I would want to be in one with a man though.

I find women repulsive. I don’t look down on them or anything, but I do despise myself. I find their voices annoying and look at them as being inferior. I believe that the only reason a man would marry a woman would be to sleep with her more often (if she was holding out because he hadn’t proposed), and he would cheat anyway. I believe that all men feel like this as well, and if they don’t they have repressed it, but they secretly want to beat up women. I thought gay men were the most like this, but in my experience, they’re the most wonderful and nicest people I’ve ever met. I still feel like they hate women a little bit, but I don’t feel they do as much as straight men. I had a very positive experience with a gay man when I was around 9, he really helped me get out of some stuff, so I tend to idolize them all a little bit.

Anyway, I am very uncomfortable by all people but I’ve noticed lately that most of my new friends have been male. I’m not in a relationship and will never be in a relationship with any of them, I’m not interested in them like that. But they’re nice, and I feel they do not look down on me as much as I would have expected males to. I hang out with them a lot, but I’m not manly or anything, I wear makeup and wear girly clothes and don’t have a manly physique. People have commented that I’m a girl at sports. Yet, I always end up hating myself for being around them too, because I hate my voice and the fact that I am female in general.

I’m not a transgender though, I don’t feel like I’m a man on the inside. I would be very uncomfortable wearing men’s clothing and having short hair and all that. I enjoy wearing girly things but at the same time, I find them disgusting. I wear baggy clothes sometimes to try to hide my body, and when men hit on me or talk to me in a non-friend kind of way, I feel terrible. The thought of those instances makes me very nauseous and upset.

What is wrong with me?

Don’t know go to a psychologist or something.Maybe you’ve heard many men being sexist towards women when you were younger and now you’ve come to believe this.You also must have some kind of complex,either superiority or inferiority that’s why you hate women.

Technorati Tags: Clothes, Fall In Love, Gay Man, Gay Men, Little Bit, Lot, Makeup, Met, New Friends, People, Physique, relationship, sex, Sleep, Sports, Straight Men, Stuff, Voices, Woman Women, Women Men

Me and my boyfriend met about 5 months ago, and have been dating for about 3 months.
We’re only 15 and 16, but we have.. well, had maybe, a good, mature relationship. We took things slowly, and respected one another. He didn’t ask for anything sexual, he let me make all the intimate decisions.

We both go to different schools, I’m a Sophomore at a new school this year, and I’m pretty shy, so I wasn’t meeting very many new people. Anyway, we still talked all the time, and I saw him at least once a week, a lot of the time 2 or 3 times… on weekdays and stuff, and we would text on a daily basis.

Now, my mom makes my home life incredibly upsetting, like, 99% of the time, but I tried not to complain about it. I only did complain about it a few times to him, I tried to keep it to myself unless he asked about it.

Everything is going great, then one day, we both went to help my Mother out at her shop, cause we both could have used a little extra money.
He acted kind of upset all day, so I asked him what’s wrong, he said "I’ll tell you when we’re alone"
So, we went to the back of the shop to clean some more, and I said "Really, are you okay?"

He said "Do you think you would be happier if you had a boyfriend at your school?"

Me: "Of course not! I care about who the person is, not whether they go to my school, or whether I see them daily."

Him: "I really want you to be happy. This is insanely hard for me to say, but I really want you to try to find someone at your school, I think you’d be happier that way. Besides, when we get back together, we’ll be so happy to see eachother, and I think the relationship will grow even more."

He thought that I wasn’t making an attempt to meet new people, and if we didn’t have a relationship, I’d try to meet people more.

I told him it was just my nature, I don’t speak to people unless they speak to me first, usually. Whether we were in a relationship or not I’d still act the same.

He still wanted me to try to meet somebody else, cause he thought I’d be happier seeing my boyfriend on a daily basis. So he said:

"We should take a break. You’re free to go up to kissing a guy… or whatever you want, I’d just prefer that’d be the most that you go. I mean, it’s gonna kill me if you do, but I really want you to be happy. Try and find somebody in these 2 weeks, please."

so I asked him a few questions about it, and we discussed it.

We agreed to take a break, 2 weeks. He said I could do anything I wanted with guys (I wasn’t planning on doing ANYTHING at all), and he said he wouldn’t even think about doing anything with a girl. He’s been cheated on before, so have I, and we both trusted eachother.
We could still talk to eachother, maybe hang out, but no relationship stuff. Just friends.

I was incredibly confused by this, but I went along with it.

We still kept our status to "In A Relationship" on our myspace, and still kept eachother as top friends (both number 2, right below our bestfriends), still texted, not too often though.
We only talked if we actually had something to say, never just "How are you!? " and carry on from there.
We hung out once within the two weeks, just as friends. It was kinda weird, but I still went along with it.

We were supposed to get back together Friday (Oct. 16), so on Thursday (Oct. 15) I texted him saying "Where the Wild Things Are comes out tomorrow, would you like to go see it with me? " It was his favorite book as a kid, and we’d planned on seeing it together weeks prior to our break.

He said "I have plans, sorry."
I said "Oh, it’s fine."

I figured he’d love having a great makeup day, since we hadn’t seen eachother in almost 2 weeks. I had an amazing evening planned out, and I was going to buy him a gift, something for his guitar, to celebrate.

We hadn’t talked about this whole break at all during the 2 week period, and I decided to ask him about it saying "So… tomorrow is Friday… end of the 2 weeks… what’s your decision on it?

He said: "I told Ashley I’d hang out with her."

I mean, on a regular day I’d be fine with him hanging out with a good friend, but this was the day we were supposed to get back together, happily.

I said "Not about what you’re doing, that’s fine.. I mean, with our break..?"

He said "Oh… I don’t know yet."

It’s been 2 days since we were supposed to get back together…
did I do something wrong?
Maybe we spent too much time together?

We both RARELY like anybody, It’s not just a new crush every few months. We were completely fine with being single. He told me he’s never felt this way. He told me he truly liked me. All of his friends said he acted different around me than all his other girlfriends. He told me I was the only girlfriend his friends not only liked, but loved.

I need someone elses point of view on this… cause I know there could be something that I’m just blind to because I’m the actual person going through it.

Hey… i can sense many things going on here –

maybe hes cheating on you
maybe hes not cheating but definitely taking a break (a long one) from you
maybe he has some friends advising him to do this, even if hes not willing to
I can sense that he doesnt want to be with you. If he really likes you, he would always try to be with you. in 3 months, a guy doesnt get bored of his GF (unless he doesnt like her / has another one)
may be he wants to focus on his career. or he likes someone else and doesnt want to cheat on you.

my advise is – if you want him back / things to be normal again – dont be clingy / dont cry / beg / get really angry or something. He knows what he is doing is not normal in any relationship. So just make him realize that you put in everything in this relationship and he is not. Also, be really strong and show that. maybe hes not telling you the reason he is acting weird is probably he thinks youll get all emotional and blame him for "playing with my heart" sort of thing.

So if you wanna know whats wrong, be patient and carry on with your life, school, be near your parents to divert attention from what is going on in your life and show him that you are just fine. Dont text him too much. youll find out the real thing in a week or two. get one of your friends to give you information about him from time to time. please dont get obsessed about it. Hope this helps.

Technorati Tags: 5 Months, Act, advice, Break, Daily Basis, dating, Decisions, Extra Money, Lot, Mature Relationship, Meet People, Met, Mom, Nature, Sophomore, Stuff, Time 2, Weekdays

It’s complicated so please bear with me. My wife agrees her dad is an alcoholic. She knows he was absent in her life growing up, and caused a lot of hurt and pain for her because she knew the drinking always came first – not her.

He pretty much always has a beer in hand, never completely trashed (around us at least). Her dads girlfriend recently made a comment about making this year more about family.

This concerned me, I found myself thinking some pretty negative thoughts about how they want to leech into our lives and onto our hard work (we’ve got our lives together) and that I would just not rather have them in our life. I don’t like the fact that I think this, because I’m usually a pretty caring person, and I find myself second guessing my "hard line in the sand" because I know its her DAD and after all he is part of the family.

Up until now, our relationship has been getting a little closer than it was (her and her dad didn’t speak or even send cards for many years). This is clearly because we had a son, and I think he realizes he messed up with her and wants to makeup for it. So he has been buying our grandson gifts, and took us out to dinner a few times, had Easter at their house (which I was out of town for).To me, I would kind of like to limit it to that, and even that is pushing it. I don’t want to be unreasonable here, and I know I need to take my wifes wants/ needs into this as well but now we are running into a situation where she arranged for them to babysit for us and the whole thing is making me REALLY uncomfortable – like my wife is allowing a serpent to sneak up on our child! I know thats a horrible image, but when she told me that is seriously what I thought. His girlfriend musta been surprised my wife allowed it too, because my wife told me she made the comment "dont worry, I REALLY AM A GOOD GRANDMOTHER". I guess my view is if you need to say something like that, then you probably aren’t! (though perhaps she is just saying that she isn’t the perpetrator of the bad behavior and trying to distancing herself from him).

My wife’s dad also recently lost his wife (to alcoholism), which may have played a part in his change, but maybe I’m just cold person but I don’t think so. I should mention that my wife seems to fool herself into believing the problems between her and her dad were caused by his wife (the one who died). So I can see how she might want to try again with him with her not there, but I think we both know deep down that, while his late wife may have been very mean to her (my wife) as a child, HER DAD was the one who made the choice to not put a priority on his daughter (my wife).

I am torn, because it would be nice if they wanted to be in our life, but I do not want them in our life on THEIR terms of current lifestyle. And I DON’T want for my son to be negatively impacted by this – in any way shape or form AT ALL. My wife and I also agree that these is little to zero chance that her dad will change. I wish my wife were stronger, But I KNOW that she will not confront him about his drinking problem, for whatever reason she is scared. I think its because she knows that if forced to pick between us (HER) and the bottle, he will choose the bottle – and that would open up deep wounds from childhood for her.

So she seems content to receive them with open arms, thinking any positive change they make is good. I agree, but where we differ is that I feel like we need to set some kind of boundaries and limit our relationship with them until they change. And even if they do change, I’ve been around alcohol long enough that I know once someone is an alcoholic they can easily fall back especially when they’ve been into that lifestyle for 40+ years.

PLEASE HELP!!

What should we do? Do I need to be the ****** in this situation? Part of me says "MAN UP" and protect your son and I know that I will do that if I need to, as of now I’ve let her take charge of matters concerning her family and so have been the a nice guy around her dad and his girlfriend. However, if I do exchange words with him, I know it will probably get heated and I will wind up issuing him an ultimatum and then my wife will be mad at ME!

If it were up to me, I’d say "drop em". Don’t need that in my life. But then again, would I be like that to my dad or mom? Probably not. So I need to be careful, I wish my wife would get the strength to see this situation for what it is, but in the meantime – what boundaries can and should be set without totally driving them out of our life? This is hard.
>>You wrote to much so I refuse to answer…..

Well PISS OFF then mate. It’s my family we’re talking about here and this could make or break it if I allow him to go with grandpa who drives drunk and kills my boy. Sorry to inconvenience you with a few paragraphs.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

You have all sorts of issues and anger here which are unrelated to these people’s abilities to grandparent/influence on your son, who will not be harmed by Grandpa being a bit beer-y. Don’t let them drive, and find something else to worry about.
—————————–
K, I can see how you would think this regarding my response to Jacks lazy, unthoughtful, non-answer. Maybe I overreacted to him, but consider that alcohol has been a problem for our family, we have put years of work into figuring out how to live with it, after having it nearly destroy our relationship (before our son). My appeal to yahoo answers may have been random, but at least I put some thought into explaining the situation so people could get as good a read on the situation as possible. Yes, Jacks answer bothered me, but please don’t mistake that for "anger unrelated to these people".
The way I see it, they made decisions in life. They CHOSE to put themselves first and made a priority out of having fun. Even when it hurt other people. I’m sorry, but thats not the kind of behavior that one should expect out of family. To me, family means you can COUNT on them. That wouldn’t apply here, and about drinking and driving, you try taking away a drunks keys. Some will let you, some won’t.
My wifes mothers boyfriend has been there from the beginning, and is 1000X better grandpa, not to mention two great grandpas on my side (my dad and step dad). I should make it clear that if my dad or stepdad with the alcohol problem, I would step in in a heartbeat and tell them they can be a part of our family on our terms. Why is it wrong to want to protect your family from a hazard?

You need to sit down with your wife and explain how you feel and the both of you agree to boundaries.
Don’t let him take care of your child alone, don’t let him drive him anywhere or anything unsafe – I’m sure you can both agree to that.

The odds are, your wife may need some counseling herself to address how she has felt all these years, and the want to make it okay shouldn’t outweigh the very real concerns you have. She’s trying to salvage an important relationship to her – and most people, once they have kids, think a LOT about their childhood and try to make things better, even if it’s just in their heads.

Limit visits. Have them over for dinner ONCE a week or once every other week. See how that goes.
Ask your wife what she feels is a good start, and see if you can build a relationship that works for all of you. UNTIL you have good reason to start limiting things again, then just slowly build things up. That way, your wife sees you’re trying to be civil, and your FIL has a chance to prove himself.

The second he seems drunk or anything, visit is over. You can’t expect him to change overnight, but you can expect him to behave decently and safely around your child. Just assuming that he will leach off your lives isn’t enough to cut him off – but unsafe behavior is.

All you can do is try to keep explaining how you feel to your wife, that you don’t want your toddler to feel how she did as a kid, and that you ARE trying to meet her halfway. You can’t cut him out until you have a good reason. Be reasonable, don’t assume the worst, and get her to agree that when you feel very uncomfortable, that she will be sensitive to that. Once you’ve agreed to some simple rules and simple visits, then drop the discussion for awhile until you can gauge how he’s being. Give it a month and see how you feel – and then either restrict more, or keep things as they are.

Maybe both of you should attend meetings of those who suffer with alcoholics, or just some counseling to help both you figure out what works for you, and how to handle him. I didn’t see anything that said RED FLAG to me – but you obviously are VERY wary of the whole thing, and are super sensitive to anything involving them.

Talk to your wife and ask her what she feels is meeting her halfway, and then try to relax and enjoy what little relationship there is UNTIL there is a serious issue such as him wanting to drive your child.

You don’t have to like your in-laws, you just have to learn to get along enough to make your wife happy, while still making sure your son is safe. I doubt your wife would let him do ANYTHING to your son considering her past – but if she has let go, you need to too.

Technorati Tags: Alcoholic, Beer, Cards, Dad, Dads, Gifts, Girlfriend, Grandmother, Guess, Hurt And Pain, Image, Line In The Sand, Lot, Makeup, Negative Thoughts, relationship, Running, Serpent, Toddler Son, Wifes

I want to try putting a bottle of vodka in my suitcase that I’m checking in, since alcohol costs A LOT on cruise ships. Is there anything I can wrap around the bottle of vodka that will let it pass through the x-ray machine undetected? Or any other strategy that might work?

Simple.

buy a bottle of mineral water, open it pour out the water and pour in the vodka close the lid.

its not usual to see someone with a 1L bottle of water, and if you get any issues, explain you are filling dehydrated etc. best thing is to carry it by hand if you can.

If you cover something with lead, you’re bags will be opened. It could be a bomb for all the guards know. That is the kind of actions that will get you thrown off the cruise before it starts

Guards with x-ray machines check 100s of bags i and fairly sure they can detect a tell tail signs of a bottle and metal lid. So a plastic bottle will be fine.

You probably will be able to find something better on the ship if you are concerned about plastic + vodka, for example give a maid a tip and they probably can get a glass container…

Technorati Tags: Alcohol, Bomb, Bottle Water, Cruise Ships, cruise vacation, Glass Container, Lot, Metal Lid, Mineral Water, Ray Machine, Ray Machines, Suitcase, Tail Signs, Vodka, X Ray